My fantasies

When I was young I would get lost in my dreams and would find myself in my fantasies.
I would spend most of the time thinking about the future and how beautiful tomorrow would be. I knew as a child I could not plan tomorrow or where I school or what I eat. But in my head when I'm alone in the bus on my way home from school, I know that the world is mine.

In my head I plan,dream and I used to pray. I believed that God was the only way towards my fantasies being real. I trusted him because I had heard he is the only one who could not disappoint. He would not leave me. He would not love me and then have to walk away from me. He would not shout at me and make me feel bad. I knew God to be someone or thing that loved me even when I didn't brush my teeth.

I told God about my dreams and fantasies . I felt him comfort me when I felt at times that life was so hard and that maybe I would not get to be an adult. I thought at times that maybe I would die a child. And never get married or learn to drive. But my knowledge of God's existance lifted me.

I was at times very afraid of Johannesburg and of all the bad things that happen to children here. But God kept me under his wings he did not let me burn or freeze. He kept me.Safe
As a child I used to be afraid when I was alone, but in my fear I knew there was God. And because he was God I knew my dreams where in his hands.